The Path Home, In Spite of the Pain

I will fight, and then I will go Home.

I know now more than ever that Bipolar Disorder is a disease. Having caught a glimpse today of what I used to be, I know Bipolar has indeed waged war upon me, and I have taken a lot of bloody blows. If it were an actual boxing match, it would have been different in two ways.

1. The towel would’ve been thrown in years ago, for my protection and safety.

2. There would have been a definitive moment when the fight was to end. 

As it stands, I am not throwing in the towel, and I know I will fight this battle until the day I die.


I find a certain comfort in that, however. At least I know what I’m up against, and at least I know when it will end.

(Even if it’s not an ideal plan, I like having me a plan, folks!)

I’m just reminded of things Paul experienced and shared. Thorn in his side. Endurance. Running towards that finish line, and spending eternity in such an unfathomable beautiful miracle of a home with Jesus.

I’m going to beat this thing and win, despite daily struggles. I will not allow anything here (a temporary home) to keep me from joining my God, my Christian family, and loved ones in Heaven.

I know this world can be uncomfortable, unpleasant, with longings for something more. Do you know when I’m down and out with mental health issues or chronic pain, I say to myself (and most always out loud) “I want to go home.”

I will do my part as God directs me here, and then have an eternity without pain, only incomprehensible love, warmth, peace and joy.

I will fight, and then I will go Home. Thank You and Praise You, Jesus.


7 thoughts on “The Path Home, In Spite of the Pain

  1. The Lord told us to Be In The World, But Not Of The World…This world is not our home. I think we often feel out of sorts and out of sync with the world, because in actuality , we are only here in this world on this earthly timeline , but our reality is that even now, as our bodies are on earth, our eternal spirit sits at the right hand of God. As He is the alpha and the omega, He is with us , and we with Him through out eternity.

    I spent years on a medication that totally repressed any feelings I had. I felt no immediate connection with God….But I pushed through this void, because I Walked By Faith And Not By Sight…..even though I didn’t feel it, I KNEW God loved me and was faithful…because the Bible told me so …and God does not lie.

    I am grateful that I finally did have a breakthrough in over coming my blunted feelings. And now share a love with my Lord and Savior…..Jesus , King of Kings

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Jen, We share a sisterhood that is our relationship with Jesus. We also share a Holy Priesthood {not that Mormon nonsense} But a true ONENESS with the Most Holy God…….if God is with us who can be against us ? …One of these days, we will meet in Heaven and know each other instantly , we will run to each other and embrace in joined joyful worship to our Lord

        Liked by 2 people

  2. I wish I had the words to express myself like Debbie did. I am not at that point of life where I am of devout faith. I’ve not been to church in a long time, nor do I read the bible. I have faith in that I am baptized and confirmed in the Catholic church. I just have extreme social phobia when it comes to going to church. But I have love in my heart for God, I pray and believe he is with me in my darkest hours. I believe he guides me in my hardest decisions etc. I pray that when my time comes I will have completed everything he has wanted me to learn and help those who need it. I do pray he helps me through my illnesses and be merciful when my time is near. Great post!!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Evidently I had read this entry in June because I see that I “Liked” it previously. I just reread today and there needed to be a “Loved it” button and I’d have hit that this morning!
    I appreciate the analogy to an actual fight. That there is a definite end to both a boxing match and to our lives. I too pray to go home and to be again to see my parents and my first love who passed away last year.
    I have had a hard couple of days and needed to reread this blog post and the comments, all of which made me feel all the more joy.
    Thanks again Jen!

    Liked by 1 person

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