14 Reasons in the Wrong Direction

I don’t even know what to type. Struggling tonight. I went outside to water the flowers I’m growing, and it hit me I might have to leave this home, and soon. I’m just sad. Not necessarily anxious, just sad. I know that when I began this blog, I said I would try to chronicle the ups and downs, depression and mania, as well as anxiety and occasional paranoia. So, I’m here. I’m chronicling. I’m talking. I just have nothing to say. I’m sad. I’m feeling the whole…”it’s not fair” gig. I’m trying my best to follow the 14 coping techniques I mentioned in the last entry, but honestly, right now I could write a whopping 114 reasons why I should give up. 114 reasons why life’s not fair. Look, I know these are feelings, not facts. I know I’ll get better. I know there are silver linings and that God has a plan. But speaking in truth, I’m just plain old sad right now. And even more honest… I’m somewhat angry.

Just keep swimming. What can I say? Dory is a smart fish.

finding-dory-movie

5 thoughts on “14 Reasons in the Wrong Direction

  1. Jen you have every right to feel sad and angry. Life sucks sometimes and it deff isn’t always fair ! Having barely survived a huge move myself I have total empathy for you right now……but you are right. God has a plan, it’s already worked out for you guys…sit back and let God do the work.

    Remember

    Be Still And Know I am The Lord

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jen,
    I can empathize for sure! I had my dream apartment last Spring and lost it because of my poor choice in trusting a man I wasn’t married to. Moving is sometimes heartbreaking 😥
    I will pray that you can find some silver lining in your situation and can find peace.
    ((((HUGS))))

    Like

  3. I know that sad feeling. Not happy, not crying, but most certainly not smiling. At these times I feel like giving up. I too am facing the days when I won’t be able to live in my house anymore. For me it is more exciting. I won’t have to do 17 stairs multiple times a day with these knees of mine. That will be an adventure. But a scary one. Right now I don’t know who’s more depressed, me, or Dave who just had open heart surgery. He looks to be doing quite well though.

    Liked by 1 person

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